


warios adventures

by barrylawn



Category: Warioware
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-20
Updated: 2016-12-29
Packaged: 2018-08-10 00:12:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 7,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7822696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/barrylawn/pseuds/barrylawn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>warioware guys go on crazy adventures CAN THEY DO IT?!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. wario DREAM land

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wario and his friends must save the coin from the vile BANKER, CAN THEY DO IT?!

wario dream land

wario was at home thinking of ways to make money.

"i know ill make another microgames game"

it was the perfect plan so he got all his mates together but he only got jimmy ana and 9 volt.

"well crap how am i gonna do dis with only 4 of us" wario thought and he gave up. maybe he should find something else thatll make him happy other than money. he wandered the streets of his mind pondering this idea but then he realized that all the buildings on that street ere banks. wario was amazed by this and started breaking into the first one. this, he thought, has money. he busted in with his charge and picked up the banker and shook him. he dropped all his money and wario picked it up and ran away.

"youll live to regret that wariooooo" he called.

wario spent the afternoon breaking into all the banks and repeating the process until he had lots of cash.

ill never be broke again thought wario as he bot a mansion and a pool and a torture chamber for mario and luigi. it was the perfect life but then the BANKER BROKE INTO HIS HOUSE AND SHOOK HIM AND STOLE A COIN!

"waaargh comeaback here" wario yelled rushing after the banker but he got away. "alright i gotta get my moneys back" wario said and he asked 9 volt to make him a banker radar to find the banker. however it was night time so they had to make sure 5 volt didnt see them work.

they worked hard all night but at midnight they didnt hear the door open and 5 volt came in.

"WARIO! 9! WHAT ARE YOU DOING" she yelled and they shook in fear. she took out her machine gun and fired at them but wario ate garlic and that gave him power so he rushed to 5 volt and punched her with his unbreakable fist. 5 volt flew out the window and wario got bitten by a bat and became a vampire and flew after her and bit her. however he was then hit by light and turned to normal. 9 volt then came down and said

"i made it" and gave wario the radar. then wario went to kat anas dojo and learned how to use a katana so he could cut the banker up. it took 200 years but eventually he mastered it.

ana gave wario a scroll thing and they rushed to jimmys club because thats where the radar said the banker was.

"hey guys wheres the banker"

"the radar says hes here but i dont see him" said ana

"I DO WAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!" wario pulled off jimmys beard and saw he was actually the banker.

"you found me wario."

"now ima kill you" said wario

"now im going to kill you" said ana

"lol yor a damn kid" said jimmy the banker

"FUCK YOU IM 200 YEARS OLD" ana shouted but her back broke.

"crap one down" wario said "guess you forced me to use my secret attack... THIS" and he pulled his bike out of his ass and drove into the banker nocking him unconcious. wario searched him and found the small bronze coin in this pocket.

"WAHAHAHAHAHA" he laughed but then he was SUCKED THROUGH A PORTAL!

"wario are you still there" said 9 volt. wario was at home with 9volt jimmy and ana next to him.

THE END


	2. warioware DANK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wario must stop the weed from taking over the world CAN HE DO IT?

one day ashley found red in her back garden

"what are you doing" said ashley

"im smoking weed evry day" said red

"ew thats disgusting it does horrible shit to your body!" she screamed. just then she had a great idea and went inside and got her potion and brewery shit together it was time to cast a spell.

MEANWHILE

wario was SPEEDING THROUGH THE CITY AT THE SPEED OF FAST LIKE HOLY SHIT LEMME TELL YA HE WAS OPEN FOR FUCKING BUSINESS! wario stopped by the cake shop.

"welcome we got cake sweets and weed" said the girl

"weed whats that" said wario

"you smoke it"

"oh ok gimme ten weeds"

the girl gave wario the weeds it only cost a dollar they were on sale because like everyone was doing it,

"yesyesyesyes" said wario and he smoked it but then he got VERY SICK AND WAFTED SO STRONG HE GOT SENT TO THE HOSPITAL!

LATER

"all better" said paine "stay away from the sweets"

"what about the weed"

"do more of that"

wario left the hospital

"bah i never do what he says im not smoking any more weed" said wario and he went home to work on that warioware and was shocked to find out that crygor added a SMOKING WEED microgame to everyones mjx!

"SHIT NO WEED IM A WEED FREE ORGANIZATION!" wario got rid of the weed and sent it to the shops.

2 HOURS LATER

2.2 not enough weed

wario was horrified when he read IGNs review of warioware weedless and he checked his gamestop account to see warioware weedless only had one purchase AND IT WAS RETURNED!

"NO! WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT" screamed wario and he punched the wall in fury. he decided to get the warioware group together to battle the weedheads but mona was on weed jimmy was on weed 9 volt was on weed ana was on weed crygor was on weed orbulon was on weed EVERYONES FUCKING ON WEED!

wario went home and found kat at his door

"wario are you on weed too" said kat

"no we gotta team up and stop the weed" said wario

"ok" said kat "where should we go first"

"i havent seen ashley yet lets go get her help ugh unless shes weed too" said wario

wario then ran to the forest and did a REALLY LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG wario land level he got all the treasure and made $6000 which is $6000 more money than he made with the latest warioware game.

"wario look" said kat but wario was too busy heaving his heavy treasure "WARIO"

"wah what the fuck do you want"

"look theres smoke someones blazing weed it must be ashley"

wario got very angry

"THATS IT IM GONNA RUIN HER!" and he bust down the doors and navigated the dark long hallways of ashleys manor killibg all the flying books and grabbing the cash.

"why are we stealing from her" asked kat

"BECAUSE SHES SMOKING WEED" raged wario and he burst down the doors to see ashley casting a long spell to MAKE EVERYONE INHALE WEED

"HAHAHAHA TAKE IN THE WEED MAGGOTS" ashley laughed but wario threw her into the cauldron and she turned to smoke.

everyone was saved from weed and IGN changed their score of warioware weedless to 7.8 because there was too much water and everyone laughed at them and the game hit 99999999999999999 sales and wario was so happy.


	3. phoenix wright ace attorney - warios turnabout

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> phoenix wright must save wario from murder accusation, CAN HE DO IT?!

one day wario was driving his car down the city road

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAA HA HA HA!" laughed wario but he wasnt watching where he was going.

he was fine though.

but just then his bike hit something and flipped over!

wario flew off his sete and landed face down on another guys car.

"OWCH!" shouted wario "WAT THE FUCK MAN!"

wario got on his feet and went to investigate the incident but he saw 5-VOLT LYING ON THE REET DED!

"WAT THE FUK NOOOOO!" screamed wario

snap

wario turned arond and saw mona had taken a pictur of him at the crime scen

"FUCK NO GIMME DAT!" wario tryid to stael the photo but mona kickd him in de hed and arested him

"WAAAAHR FUK YU MONA!"

wario was driven to the tension center.

"waaaaht am i a gonna do" said wario. he pondered these wise words "WAHA! ILL CALL A LAWWYER!"

it was da bezd plan so he phoned his pal to get a lawyer

"wah! hey phoenix how ya doin"

"who is this" said the phone

"ITS ME YUR A BESTEST PAL WAAAAHRIO!"

"dosnt ring the bell" said phone

"look phoenix i need a lawyer so GET OVER HERE!" wario stuck his hand through the phone and dragged phoenix out.

"AH!" screamed phoenix "WHO ARE YOU!"

"ima wario!"

"uh okay weid so you want my lawyer skills?" said phoenix

"hell yes" said wario

"ok" said phoenix and he went to leave but he bonked his head on the glass "WAT!" screamed phoenix "YOU PULLED ME ITO PRISON?"

"oops sorry"

phoenix saw a guard passing by and decided to escap from prison.

"(ok lets try this i saw it in a youtube video once.) thought phoenix. he stared at the gard with naughtiness and said

"hey gard wanna com in and play wit me"

but the gard wasnt taking any of his crap

"im not gay phoenix and dont tink yu can convict me otherwise"

phoenix kept staring

but it didnt do aything

guard walked away but phoenix yelled

"HOLD IT!"

guard turned around

"what"

"ill pay you 5 cents"

"ok"

guard unlocked the door and phoenix ran out. but he didnt give the guard 5 cents because he didnt bring any money

"AAAAH! PRISON BREAK!"

phoenix beat up all the guards and ran out the door.

"WAIT GUYS IM INNOCENT!" shouted phoenix showing his defense attorney bagde to prove it

"ok oops sorry" said police and they went back to work.

phoenix was finally free so he went to investigate the crime.

he went to the street and saw 5 volt lyig ded under a bike

"(this is bad)" thought phonex. how was he gonna prove wwario inocint?

he looked around and a policeman came over

"im mona and your clients guilty" mona gave phoenix the photo of wario grinning at the body

"oh no" said phoenix

he looked around and saw 5 volts dna on the grass

"maybe i can use this" said phoeix and he put it in his pocket

however as he walked to cort SOME GUY DRAGGED HIM AWAY!

"AAAH FAGGOT!" screamed phoeix but he was hit o the hed

phoenix woke up in a dark room

"who de fuck did this" said phoenix

"I DID PHOENIX WRITE" shoted a DARK GASTLY EVIL voice

"who are you"

"I AM YOUR MURDERER" shouted a DARK GASTLY EVIL voice

"OH NO!" phoenix was lifted by invisible stuff over a cauldron

"PREPARE TO DIE PHOENIX!" shouted the DARK GASTLY EVIL voice but then PHOENIX BROKE FREE!

"WHAT?! TREASON!" phoeix ran for the door "STOP HIM AT ALL COSTS!"

suddely a small red thing appered but phonesx just ran it over. he grabbed somthing off the shelf to sue the DARK GASTLY EVIL voice later but first we gotta get to court!

so phoenix ran down the hill and jumped off the cliff!

"NOOOOOO!"

everything was in slow motion it looked really dan col and the phoenix landed on the roof and FELL THROUGH!

"ah mr wriht your here" said udgey

"yes your honor i am" said phoenix

"and so am i faoggt" said mona who was also the prosecutor

"no your not you dont have evidence!" said phoeix presenting the photo

"oh right but HAHAHA you just presented it so ow i can find wario guilty!" laughed mona

"FUCK!" screamed phoenix! badplan!

"well i declare wario-"

"NO!" shouted phoenix "CROSS EXAMINE!"

"OK!"

REBUTTAL

"wario was drunk driving with his bike down the road. suddenl he ran over 5 volt. he then lauged at ther body on the street."

"OBJECTION!" shouted phoenix "the victims dna was found on the grass which means SHE WAS RUN OVER THERE!"

"phoenix your fucking RETARDED!" shouted mona "cant you use your fucking breain he moved her!"

"oops" said phoenix and he was penilized

" call my witness 9 volt to the stand"

999 volt came

"DAM YOU WAIRO YOU KILLED MOMMY AD PHOENIX FUCK YOU TOO!"

"witness testify" said mona

"okay gadly"

WITNESS TESTIMOY

"mommy was walking down the street. she told me to go to the bookshop. however i turn around and saw her lying on the grass. the wario ran over her"

"OBJECTION!" shouted phoenix "so she was o the ground before he ran over her"

"yeah"

"THIS CA ONLY MEAN ONE THING!" shouted phoenix "THE WITNESS WAS ALREDY DED!"

"but how" said mona

"i can only think of one way TAKE THAT!" phoenix presented the thing he got from the hated house

"wtf is that"

"THIS is a half full bottle of poison THIS WAS THE REAL MUDDER WEAPON!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAGH!" screamd mona

"but whos is it right" said udgey

"ITS ASHLEYS!"

"NOOOOO!" scremed mona because he was right. mona summoed ashley to the stand

"name and occupation bitch" said mona she was VERY angry because ther was a new sspect

"im ashley and im innocent" said ashley

WITNESS TESTIMONY

"thats not my potion"

"OBJECTION!" shouted phoenix presenting fingerprints "yes it is"

"damn" said ashley but she continued

"well you cant prove she drank it"

"OBJECTION!" shotued phoenix and he presented dna on the bottle wich was 5 volts "yes she did"

"shit" she continued anyway but felt the pressure

"well you cat prove it killed her"

"OBJECTION!" shouted phoenix presenting blood wihc was 5 volts "yes it did"

"FUCK!" screamed ashley. she continued

"w well you cant prove it was actually the poison can you"

"OBJECTION!" shouted phoenix and he rpesented 5 volts dna in the liquid "yes t did!"

"FUCK YOU PHEENIX YOU TINK YOUR SO CLEVER DO YOU?!" shouted ashley

"yes i do thats why i found 4 contradictions in your entire testimony"

"WELL YOUR NOT YOUR FUCKING STUPID!"

phoenix shed a tear because she hurt his feelings

"WAAAH! PHOENX DONT LISTEN TO HER GET ME INNOCENT DAMMIT!" shouted wario

"O OKA!" shouted phoeix and he slammed the desk "these all mean that YOUR THE KILLER IDIOT ACCEPT THAT!"

"OBJECTION!" shouted phoenix "no id doesnt you just proved its mine and that it killered but not that I KILLED HER WIT IT!"

"OH DATS EASY" said phoenix "ill call a witess"

"WHO"

"THE SHOPKEEPER WHO WAS WIT 9 VOLT!"

"WHY"

"HE MIGHT HAV SEEN SOMETHING 9 VOLT DIDNT"

"NOOOOOOO DONT!" screamed ashley sweting

"um the uh p p prosecuton calls the shoppy to the stand" said mona

the shopkeeper who was orbulon came to the stand

"wat"

"WITNESS!" shouted phoenix "DID YOU SEE THAT MIDGET GIVE THE WOMAN A DRINK"

"huh yeh. i thogt it was just a normal dirnk it was green thoguh"

"NOOOOOO!" screamed ashley and her har turned wite and she died of old age.

"DAMITDAMITDAMIT!" screamed moan "ILL KILL YOU PHOEIX!"

"no you wont because im ot from this world" said phoenix

"DAMN!"

"uhhhh okay... NOT GUILTY!" said udgey

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!" laughed wario after the trial

"wat"

"phoenix you FUCKIG DUMBASS! IT WORKED!"

"huh"

"I KILLED HER PHEONIX HAHAHA YOU WER TRICKED!"

wario ran out and got on his bike and sped away VERY fast!

"stop him!" shouted the bailiff ad the police ran after him.

"oh well" said phoenix because ashley was already executed. so he went hom and told maya what happened.

THE END


	4. wario land CAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wario must reassemble his car CAN HE DO IT?!

one day wario was out for a day out with his plane

"waha i a lov my plain" he said but suddenly he herd the engi sputter

"wargh?" said wario and den he went FLYING OUT DE WINDSHELD!

"ouch!" he shouted ladig on the groud. "wat a happen" suddenly HIS CAR BLEW UP TO PIZZAS!

"NOOOOOO!" screemd wario. the pieces went all around the forest.

"alright i gotta get em back!

wario went on a BIG adveture through de frest it was rely fun he got trasur and bet up bad fucks

however wen he fod de engin a bird grabbed it

"SHIIINY!" it hiss

"HEY BURD GIV DAT BAK" shout wario

"yu will haf to battle me for it!" laugh burd

"ok"

so bird flew do but wario PUNCHED HIM AND SPUM HIM AD THREW HIM AND HE DIE!

"WAAAAAHAHAHA!" laughe wario "AREA CLEER!"

wario ran into a cave and ran thru som more levels wen suddenly

"CRASH!"

"wat a was dat" said wario and he turn and a BOLDER WAS COMING! "WAAAAAH!" waro ran away like india johns but der was a PIT RITE THERE!

"NOOOOOOOO!" screemed wario we he got an idea. he ran fast and JUMPED OVER IT... BUT HE MISSED!

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" screemed wario wen he LADED ON DE BOLD!

"ITS A MIRCILE OF LIEF!" screemd wario and he JUPED OFF DE BOLDER AND IT FELL INOT PIT OF DETH!

"few" said wario and he defeted de bolder. he grabde the widnow "WAAHAHAHA AREA CLEER!" he said again and he jumped into a portal and landedin hell

"AAAAH FIRE!" roaord wario

"HAHAHA" laughed satan (ITS A TRAP!)

wairo was stuck in an oven of fire

"give up wario youll never get your car back!"

just den DE BULDER OF DETH LADED AND HURT STAN!

"WHAT?!" he shout ad den de bolder BROKE DE LOCK OF OVEN!

"DAMN!" shouted bouder and it was burned by sata

"FINE ILL KILL YU DIRECTLY DIS IS WAT HAPENS WE YOU MES WIT ME!"

and satan turned into a GINTE EVIL BATH!

"WAAHAHA!" laughed wario who tuned into a BASEBALL BAT!

de two batlled but it was o use becaus wario STRUCK SATAN ITO DE SUNSET AND GOT A HOAM RUN!

"WAAAAHAHA!" shoted wario and he grabbed de golden car seet and made his car ad drove the hoam run

i meen if yu can run the ting easy ya mite as well drive right?


	5. warioware CUT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wario must make a new game to stop orbulon from killing the world CAN HE DO IT?!

one day kak and ana were in there dojo traning to be ace samurais

"bad bad BAAAAAAD" shouted their leader the steel samurai "yu two are FAIL! GET OUUUUUUT" and he took out a samurai spear and went to cut them but they ran

"hey kek" said ana

"wat" said kat

"did yu see the way he cut?"

"WOW!"

they grin at their new idea

wario was gonna give dem some money

for once

they ran all the way to warios house and kicked down his door

"WAAAAAH!" shouted wario waking up "whos a der?!" he yelled getting out of bed and charging down stairs liek dat dragon guy from 2001 or somtin

"wario we have an ideaaaaaaaaaa" shouted ana

"wah? ok what"

they went into warios game office where he makes games and ideas and draws the art useed in those games

"a game where we CUT everything" siad kat

"WAAAAHAHAHAHHAHAH" laughed wario "EXCELLENT! it will be famous game in the world!"

he gave kar and ama the bucks and they went to do stuff with it

wario drew a canvas over himself and turn into artsy wario

he drew a REALLY big game with sissers and paper

"MY PASTERMIECE!" shouted wario finishing the drawing and it came to life

but when it did

it turned into a shit

"WHAAAA- oh yeh i can only draw like 3 tings DAMMT"

so he drew a W and turn back to normal wario

"well crap better get this idea to the coder"

he ran outside but when he did ORBULONS SPACE SHIT CAME DOWN

"GREETING EARTHLING I AM HERE TO DESTROY YOU"

"WHAAAAT" shouted wario "NO! YU CANT KILL ME!"

"im sorry wario but theres nothing to do wit yu anymore so ill just kill everyone since i cant have fun with dem any more BA HA HA HA HAAAAA"

"DAMMIT ILL SHOW YOU!"

wario ran to the garbaj and took out his bike

but it wouldnt start

"BAAAAH!" he shouted and then he saw mona driving past

he charged at her and threw her off her bike and he got on and drove to town

"FAGGET!" shoted mano

he drove down the street and got off her bike (geddit because its monas not warios so its hers not his you guys are dumb) and ran to 9 volts house

it took 5 hours but eventually he got to the house

"daammit i shuda got off the bik later" sweat wario

the door open

"hey wario what is it" siad 9 volt

wario threw the game idea in his face

"CODE THIS LITTLE NERD!" shouted wario

"but mom want me to clean my-"

"FUCK HER! THE WORLD DEPENS ON THIS!"

"woaaaah okay" said volt

he ran up to his lab

"NINE GET OUTTA THE LAB" shouted five volt but wario kicked her in the face and locked her in the basement because anyone siding with orbulon was a villain to him.

a little later nine came out with the new warioware game

"ok ive got a bunch of people to put their microgames in it like mona jimmy kat ana me-"

"ok ok wat about orbulon"

"sorry cant get in contact with him"

"DAMMIT! HARRY AHP!" he grabbed the game and the cock started ticking down from 10 minutes (yknow like in wario land 4)

he ran out the door and down de drive way and jump on her bike at the gate

he drove down to the city as fast as he could

"WHER IS ORBUL0N" shouted wario and den someone pointed up and he saw the pig ship above that japanish tower thing in the first game that that skeleton took over

there was tunder everywhere

everyone was screaming and trying to escap from the tower

wario ran up the tower and faced orbs

"ORBS YOU FUCKER WHY YU DESTROY THE EARTH??? ILL KILL YOU!!!"

"ah aha ha ha ha ha!" laugh orbulalien "NO!"

they ran at each other and fought

wario try to beat orbuls with his charge but obelan used advanced alien telportation and technology to warp around and kicked him in the back

he punched him in the gut and he FLEW OFF THIS BUILDING

"LMAOOOOO" laughed orbulon crying of laughter and he danced to humpty dumpty by queen its a great song you shud listen to it n this next part of the story.

he dance to the song but wario was all like

"not on my watch"

and he climbed back up the tower because it turns out he grabbed a conveniently placed flag pole just below the roof like that one scene in professor laytons eternal diva thats how badass it was.

"WHAAAAT" shouted orbuon

but then wario turned to the police

"TAKE THAT OFFICERS" cakled wario and he splashed atriquonine in peoples faces and they die

"WHY YU DOING THAT" shouted orbulon

"because i cant let them kill you!" wario took out his game

"what is that" said orbulon

"this is warioware CUT its all about cutting people up why dont you make your own microgames thats your calling in life wright?"

"yeah" said orbulon and he made hard microgames

"launching fire canon in 2 minutes" said the loud annoying voice

"AAAAH WE GOTTA STOP IT" shouted wario

he ran up to the ship

"launching fire cannon in 1 minute 50 seconds" siad the loud annoying voice

wairo search the orbudeck

"launching fire canon in 1 minute 20 seconds" said the loud annoying voice

wario found a red button on the orbudeck

it opened the stop cannon switch

"launching fire canon in 1 minute 30 seconds" said the loud annoying voice

wario ran to the stop fire cannon button

"launching fire canon in 1 min-"

"OMFG shut up your more annoying than the incinerator in 99!"

"sorry"

wario hit the stop cannon button and the cannon stop

"launching fire canon in never" said the loud annoying voice

"fucking thank you"

wario left the ship and everyone cheered for him and picked him up and carred him to the town hall

"thank YOU" said wario

he had just received his award of earth defense and he was so happy

"i would like to dedotate my award to all my friends 9 volt kat ana orbulon jimmy but not mona FUCK YOU MONA!"

THE END

EPILOG

"hey sumone let me out" shouted the basement door


	6. professor layton and the micro games

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> professor layton must save warioware inc from the evil man CAN HE DO IT?!

A PROFESSOR LAYTON X WARIO WARE CROSSOVER BY BARRLAWN

(note: dis fic is set 2 months before professor layton and the secret agent conspiracy its not part of the series but its canon)

one morning professor layton was in grassenhaller university lecturing his students about arceeology and fossils

"yaaaaaaawn" yawned layton

"awww wats rong proseffor l" asked rosetta

"fuck off rosetta its wendsday and im STILL tired"

"awwwww sounds like yu need some morning raep"

"NO"

layton pulled off his hat and THREW IT AT ROSETTA

"GAAAAAASP" gasped an old man voice beside him

he turned and saw luke was at the door pointing at him and delmona was next to him

"I SAW IT SIR HE ATTACKED HER" wiled luke

"no shit luke so did i" said delmona

"AAAAGH DELMONA I CAN EXPLAIN"

"SILENTS" shouted delmona "attacking a student is FORBIDDEN!"

"WHAT" shouted layton "BUT WHY ISNT RAPING PROFESSORS FORBIDDEN"

"SHUT UP YOOOOUUUUUUR FIIIIIIIIREEEEEEED!" he yelled

"NO" shouted layton

"NO" shouted rosetta

"NO" shouted students

"2BAD" shouted demona "IM your professor from now on"

"NOOOOOOOO"

layton pack his trunk with clothes money and puzles and went for the door but then

"OH PRAFESSAH" said an old lady voice and he turned and saw rosa coming

"prafessah a letteh came fo yu"

he opened the letter and read it

"WAAAA HA HA HALLO!

im a wario and i heer u need a job so com a down to warioware inc and well discuss finance and legal issues so you can join us

\- WOHRIO"

"lets go luke"

layton and luke got into the tritonmobile and drove down to warioware inc hq

"weh heh heh so u were once a professor huh"

"yes sir"

"and what sorta micro games can ya give us?"

"puzzles"

"excellent!" said wario "you are hired here is a list of my staff"

wario gave layton a list that showed all the names like mona jimmy 9 volt ashley ana and others

they all had their photos but something was strange about one of them but layton could not put his finger on it.

wario brought layton down to game lab and there was little girl there

"this is ur guide ashley help de gentleman wit coding" he said and left

ashley stare at them emotionless like wensday in de adams family

holy shit she DOES look like wensday

holy shit shes a LOT like wensday

btw its wensday

"wat" she muttered

"how do we make games yung laddy?"

"you draw tings then yu make de game dat u hav to finish in 5 seconds"

"WOAH"

"wow prafesseh weve never had time limits set on our puzzles before" said luke

"indeed luke" said layton "a most satisfying and challenging twist to out usual formula"

"so do we lose picarats if we run out of time?" asked luke

"no" said ashley "you get a penalty now shut up make ur game and go away"

layton set to work and made the simplest puzzle he cud imagine

PUZZLE 1

"this puzzle is worth 10 picarats"

"there are 3 frogs sitting in a line. one of dem swallows a key. the red frog jumps over the green frog. the orange frog jumps over the red and green frogs. how can you tell which one has the key"

"ok luke you test it" said layton

PUZZLE 1

"this puzzle is worth 10 picara-"

BOOM

a part of the green bar layton set as his penalty bar blew up

"oh" said layton "u didnt have a chance let me fix that"

layton removed the part about the picarat since it didnt let luke even start the puzzle

"tanks prafesseh now "there are 3 frogs sitting in a line. one of dem swallows a key. the red frog jumps ove-"

BOOM!

"WHAAAAH?"

"luke youve SHAMED me!"

"but prafessah i didnt have enough time to finish it"

"what have i thought you over these years? a quick mind is the KEY to success!"

"BUT ITS IMPOSSIBLE!"

"nonsense let me try"

layton started the puzzle

"luke heres my answer" said layton and he pointed at lukes nose "you shud expect no less from a gentleman" because he cut the frogs stomachs open and there was blood everywhere

"good enuf" said ashley and she sent the game over to wario

A WEEK LATER

"BROKEN NEWS: warioware: PUZZLE hits the shelvs"

"wa ha ha exelent" said wario

"WOAH WATS THIS" gasped the dog on the news "critics rate warioware PUZZLE 0%!"

"bah dats just ign being ign"

"ALL CRITICS YOU SAY?"

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

"this jutt in fokes critics say tat the new character professor laytons microgame section is utter garbage and impossible to complete! dis is a terrible oversite by warioware inc and we dont expect the game to sell very well at a-"

the screen turn off

wario glare at the screen in rage and anger and remote shook in his hands

he pressed the button remote that turn on mic and he shouted into it

"GROUP MEETING! NOW!"

layton luke jimmy mona kat ana ashley 9 volt 18 volt dribble spits orbulon crygor mike and wario gathered in warioffice

"somebody has RUINED my sales by making shitty games"

"ugh jesus christ wario" said mona "we survived after snapped well survive after this too"

"NO" wario hit desk "i will not allow the culprit to escape me dis time"

wario turned to professor layton and pointed at him "YOU, LAYTEN, ARE THE MASTERMIND BEHIND THIS DISASTER!"

layton clench his fist and stood up slow and angry

"excuse me mr wario?"

wario waved the puzzle in laytons face

"THIS IS GARBAGE"

"you sir do not grasp the beuty of PUZZLES!"

"WE CANT SOLVE THIS IN 5 SECONDS"

"OF COURSE U CAN ITS THE ESIEST PUZZLE IN THE WORLD"

"AND THERES TOO MUCH BLOOD"

"A TRUE GENTLEMAN ACTS LIKE A MAN"

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH" wario cried in pain at laytons flawless logic

"but" said ana "our games are for rated kids"

"...indeed" said layton.

he put his hand to his mouth like wen he thinks and walked slowly to middle of the room

"due to de bloody nature of dis game it SHOLD have been rated for gentlemen."

"OHHH" said ana

"someone in this room tampered with the age rating" said layton

"wah? who?"

layton look up with angry face

"the same person who looks suspcious n their photo

"and whos that"

"if there is anyone here who should seem suspiscious..."

jimmy stared

orbulon stared

kat stared

and layton turned around and pointed

"it is YOU, KID!"

he pointed at 9 volt

"WHAAAA?" shouted nine "how can i be suspishis"

"tell me mr volt how old are you?"

"9"

"well dats odd" said layton "a true 9 year old NEVER grows a MUSTACHE!"

and the everyone realized that nine was hairy

"AAAAGH"

"the strange thing about your photo" said layton and he pointed "was that YOU, a nine year old boy, had a mustache!"

"l...l...LAAAAAAYYYYYYTTTTOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNN!" screamed nine and he stood up and pulled the mustache off and it was DON PAOLO!

"DON" shouted layton "it was you all along!"

"but wheres 9 volt" sad kat and then she heard 9 volt banging on de door of his closet so she used her kat ana to cut open the lock and 9 volt burst out

"GUYS HES THE CULPRIT!" he shouted

"BAAAAAAH" shouted paolo "dammit i thought i cud infiltrate the most famous company in the world ruin it and steal their ideas and make all the moneys but now i have to run BYE GUYS!"

he ran and dropped the warioware inc secret formula which details how to make a perfect microgames and is the key to warios success

"and as you can see" said layton "don paolo had this in his possession so you couldnt know my puzzles werent suitable for your game i am not at fault"

"hmmm i a see" sad wario pondering this concept "your fired"

"WHAT"

"you still made shitty game get outta here"

and he picked up layton and luke and spun em around and THREW EM OUT THE WINDOW

"HAVE A WARIO DAY" he shouted and they flew all the way back to gressenheller

"LAYTON your BACK" shouted delmona who was covered in sweat from teeching "yur students are INCOMPETENT no matter how many times i say it they still dont know fossils are found in the clouds PLEASE take job back im BEGGING YOU"

"you have a deal old fuck" said layton

THE END


	7. warioware RED

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wario must save the world from redness overload CAN HE DO IT?!

one day wario was in his bed sleeping

he should be making the new warioware game but he was asleep

and because he was asleep he couldnt work on the new warioware game because he wasnt awake

but then dreamy wario realized that if he didnt make it he wouldnt make money so he became a wake

but he was still in the dream

"WAAAAHT?" said wario "why is a world full of red" he said because the world was the red the walls were red the windows were red the curtains were the red the shoes were red and the air was red

he tried to wake up but he was already awake so he cant do that.

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA DIS EES UNNACCEPTABELL!" shouted wario

he decided to do something about his house so he got out his phone and dialled his friends number

bring

bring

bring

beep

"hello" said the phone

"hey bob get ovah here i need ya ta fix mah house"

so bob came over and took the house down and replaced it with white and yellow and stuff and he was singin like "BAAAAAAAAWB DA BILLLLLLKAAAAAAAA"

"done" siad bob "now gimme ur money or else"

"wahaha" laughed wario "u dont scare me its not like ur an assassin"

"WHAT" said bob sweating

and then wario PICKED HIM UP AND THREW HIM OUT OF AMERICA

"HAVE A WARIO DAY!"

wario then got in his car which was also red

"WAHHH! DIS IS REDICULOUS!"

he threw the car in a garbage can full of purple paint and took it out again

"wahaha excellent"

wario drove down to the beach and got in his private rowing boat and rowed to crygors island

"yes its very strange" said crygor who was redder than he was in touched "i like being two colors but here i am full of red"

"can you help me solve this mistary crygor?"

"yea" said crygor and he dragged a robot out from machine "alright mike figure it out"

"computing. computing. la la la LA LA LA LA LA LA! IMA MIKE AND IM-"

"shut the FUCK up!" shouted wario throwing a paint can at mike and he BLEW UP!

"STUPID WARIO! NOW I GOTTA SEND HIM BACK TO THE MOON! AGAIN!" shouted crygor and he tied mike to a rocket and sent it to space

"wait" said wario who saw a paper land where the rocket blasted off "OH CRYGOR LOOK ITS HIS RESULTS!"

wario picked up the results and read them

"the color red is of the same sex values of... MARIOS HAT!"

"WAAAT" said crygor

"WAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" laughed wario

he ran out of the lab and got in his car and drove down to

wait

where does mario live

wario pondered this question

"O WAIT I KNOW!"

so he drove down to the volt house and opened the door to let himself in

"wahahallo!" said wario

he ran to 9 volt who was on table

"hey nine i need ur NES"

"ok"

9 volt got off the table and plugged in the NES

"NIIIIINE VOOOOOOLLLLT" screamed 5 volt who ran in "YOUR SUPPOSED TO BE DOING UR HOOOOOMEWOOOOOORK!"

she slapped him in the face and plugged out the NES

"BITCH U GTFO OR ILL-"

5 volt picked wario up and THREW HIM OUT THE WINDOW!

"OWWWWCH" shouted wario scratching the broken glass out of his ass

wario broke in through the window and wiped the broken glass from his face

he saw 9 volt crying on the ground

"shes taken my sweet NES away from meeeeee!" cried 9 volt

wario stiffed

if he couldnt get the NES the world was fucked to be red forever

"dont a worry ill save it" said wario

he broke down the door

"OBJECTION!" shouted 5 volt "MINIONS! STOP THAT MAN!"

and then the dishes and the vacuum and the sink the toilet the salad and anything else mothers use came to life

"WAAAA NOOO!" shouted wario

he bash the dishes and they cut his elbow and then de vaccuum tied around his neck

the sink hit his jaw open and the salad entered his body!

"BLECH GROSS STOP NOOOO" screamed wario

"more more!" shouted the faucet and his face filled with red tomatos

"BLECBLECKBLECKBLECK"

"alright minions let him wash it out" said 5 volt so the toiler went up and poured its yellow water into his mouth

"BLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACH"

"AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA" laughed 5 volt like a witch "now minions... REPEAT!"

just then

BRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT

WARIO FARTED AND IT WAS REALLY GROSS IT SMELT OF RED ROTTEN SALAD AND PISS

"EWWWWWWWWWW" moaned the dishes and the salad and they died and the vaccuum lost hold of his neck and wario cannonballed away and flew around the room like a rocket on gas and then he flew into 5 volt and knocked her into the basement

"fucking whorecunt" said wario

he went up to her bedroom and broke open the chest and looked inside

DA DA DA DAAAAAAA

he got de NES so he went down to TV

he plugged it in and started the game

"get REDDY mario"

SUPER MARIO BROS

GAME START

wario walked to the left and died to the goomba

"holy shit!" saidd the goomba and he danced around the screen "i did it! I FINALLY DID IT!"

AND AS HE WAS DANCING

THE WORLD STOPPED BEING RED

"WAHAHAHA!" laughed wario "I A DID IT!"

he went to his normal home and released his new game, warioware: COLOR SPLASH

THE END


	8. warioware: SWITCH

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> now wario must save himself by making game for switch

WARIOWARE SWITCH

BY BARRYLAWN

one day in wario land prison wario was makin noise

"waaaaah, i shuda not abe heahr!" he shouted

"shut up wario we dont need u any more warioware is ded" said the guard

"wah, i shal make new game hows that"

"ok fine u have 3 days to make a new game"

"fine"

wario ran home and started writing the new game

he kept writing and coding and talkin with his frends until the third day when game was complete so he ran back to prison

"hey itsa here" said wario presenting the nintendo ds with wario game

"HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA" laughed nintendo "dis is for old sistem. WE USING NEW CONSOLE NINTENDO SWITCH NOW, WE CANT SELL THIS CRAP" he threw the ds in warios face

"WAAAAH?" shouted wario as he got the nintendo switch a new game console handheld thing by nintendo

"ha ha ha" laughed nintendo "and it just releesed today so we killed ds wii wii u and 3ds, its too late wario go to jail"

"NOOOOO, U BASTARD ILL THINK OF SOMETHING" shouted wario

but the guards were already there with guns to all his frends faces so wario would give up

"dont do it wario" said 9 volt

"dammit!" shouted wario "only one thing to do"

and he took out his phone

"HELLO LINK? GET OVER HEEEEEEEEEERE"

and then the phone pulled link out

"ok what" said link and wario pointed at the cops "oh ok"

right ay down right ay down

the world lit up and wario and link fell through portal of white for a while until he wasnt in white but black cause it was night of the first day

"wtf send me back to dawn" said wario

"oops things broken" said link "o well good luck"

and link went back to terminal to stop moon

"ok i gots the nintendo nx switch now" said wario "lets make game base on this"

so wario made a bunch of microgames where u have to go to handeld mode insted of screen mode caus the screen is too big to see wat stuff is and go back to screen mode caus handhold is too small to see shit

he got his pals to test if it worked but he got letter in teh mail

"dear wario

night of the final day"

"FUUUCUUCUK" shouted wario "HARRY AHP"

and he ran to car as wario land 4 clock thing counted down from 6 minutes like DLING DRONG RING TONG BLING RONG BRZT BRONG

he drove to nintendo hq but remembered they were waiting at prison not nintendo so he had to go there instead it took like 5 minutes but he got there and ran into office

"I A GOT IT" shouted wario shoving the switch game in nintendos face "PLAY IT SELL IT ITS GREAT"

so nintendo played it

and he turned to wario and said

"no"

"WAAAH" shouted wario as the men grabbed him

"PUNISH HIM" nintendo pointed at teh men and they took out guns and pointed them at warios head

BUT THEN THE SWITCH JUMPED OUT OF THE TOASTER AND HIT THEM DEAD

"SWITCH UR ALIVE" shouted wario

"yes cause they set the toaster to life mode which brings toast to life which makes them taste good so it also gave me life so im life an-"

"ARHRAHRPMMMMMMMMMM" wario ate the switch "wtf that tasted baaahd"

and den nintendo shook and shook and shook and shook and then theyr eyes were normal cause they were white before

"wario u save us!" said nintendo "we were controlled by teh mysterious power of 2016 to kill all of our good games and ruin the really good ones but we back now dont worry well release ur new game and make u famous"

"WAAAAHAHAHAHHA exellent" said wario "hey wait wheres the game"

but wario didnt bring the ds game when link played the song of time

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

THE END


	9. warioware: CHRIST

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wario must pray to holy detective jesus CAN HE DO IT?

WARIOWARE: CHRIST

BY BARRYLAWN

wario was sleepin in bed dreaming about krazy microgames that could be in warioware 2017

"yes yes YEEEEEEEAAAAS" he said in his sleep

just then wario woke up cause he heard noise on the roof

"waaargh, who there to steal my shit" said wario

he sneaked out to the room and saw the fireplace turn off

AND THEN A GUY FELL IN

"WAAAAAH, ITS SANTA"

he ran to grab him and steal his shit but it wasnt santa

it was JESUS CHRIST

"ah help me young man" said jesus "i am detective jesus i come from the country the kingdom of khura'in, do you have a phone i need to call my friends apollo justice datz are'bel and ahlbi ur'gaid so one of them can come and save me"

but wario grabbed him and shook him but no presents came out

"WAAAAH, bro ur the worst santa ever"

"im not santa stupid" said jesus "im jesus, da real christmas thats important!"

"fuk dat, money is important, cause ima wario, teh only important stuff ta me is money and WARIO!"

"ok look bro if u give me ur phone ill work for you for free til they come"

"WAHHH?" said wario "o tank ur father who is GOD, all my friends dont wanna work cause its the holiday or some shit, idk why they wouldnt wanna make money on a holiday so lets work"

jesus called apollo justice ace attorney and he agreed to get datz to fly over there in their plane

"ok datz will be here shortly" said jesus

"okai, GET TA WORK"

wario picked jesus up and threw him onto the chair

he made lots of microgames the number was getting to like 500

"ok fine tats enough for a whole game" said wario

he went to the menu of warioware: CHRIST and chose jesuss face

1

some guys were hanging jesus to a cross so wario hit the hammer a bunch of times until he was nailed

2

wario shinyed the cross so god would be proud of him

3

god was creating a human so wario rolled the head around like a snowball and threw it onto the body like a snowman cause thats how babies are made not with sexy stuff if ya didnt know

4

the prest was at church so wario blew into the microphone to make him pray

BOSZ

someone was reading the bible when suddenly SANTA CAME AND POSSESSED THE BIBLE

not satan SANTA

the bible came alive and thunder crashed everywhere

"WAHHHH" shouted wario and suddenly he was in the game

wario threw chairs from the church at the bible but the bible was holy so it had a shield to protect it

"wario died on the cross accordin to luke!" shouted the bible and luke triton came and attacked wario and tryed to nail him to a cross so wario punched him

and he picked him up and spun him around and around and threw him away

"HAVE A WARIO DAY" shouted wario

and luke flew all the way back to gressenheller university where professor layton was teaching

luke told professor what happened and he figured everything out

layton ran to wario who was still fighting the santabible and he was like

"hold it gentlemen, the true culprit is YOU SANTA" he pointed at santa and santa blew away from the wind of laytons finger point

and the bible was saved and wario got all the presents

"YEAAHHHH" shouted wario in the real world "wait THAT WAS ALL ONLY IN THE GAME"

"yes dont be greedy" said jesus "its a sin"

"FUCK THAT" shouted wario "see all them presents in the game? MAKE THEM REAL, UR JESUS SO U CAN DO IT"

"no" said jesus

"WAAAAAAAAARGH" he grabbed jesus and spun him around and around and threw him back to kingdom of khura'in

===LATER===

wario answered the knock on the door

"hey" said a guy with a reallllly big mouth "im datz are'bel, im here for my friend detective jesus christ have ya seen him"

"DATZ HES HOME" shouted apollos voice on the phone

"oh ok, see ya later mr sir" said datz and he jumped and he disappeared back to khura'in

"weird" said wario but he closed the door and sold his new game and made $100000000000

THE END


End file.
